Categories
Inspiration/Enlightenment

I Was Running…

I was talking to my wife and son the other night and the LORD reminded me of the depths of my spiritual calling/purpose.

Ten years ago, I had reached a crossroads in my life, which I didn’t or couldn’t discern as a crossroads at the time. The only thing I knew is how I felt – empty, unhappy, and unfulfilled. These feelings came along with an insatiable desire to do something about it, so I set out on a journey to fill and fulfill myself. I resolved this would be done through the medium of music – a childhood talent, interest. Well, the mediums (roads) of music and music business didn’t lead to fulfillment, which, as I stated, I had already determined it would. Hence, what you have is a made-up mind + the reality of the polar opposite happening = equaling confusion, frustration, anxiety, depression, hopelessness. The thing I was sure would lead to my happiness and fulfillment led me the opposite way, and I couldn’t bare it. I was heartbroken, wounded, devastated. I crumpled over and shriveled up. I was a shell of myself. I was defeated and I couldn’t hide or cover it up anymore. I was beaten, battered, and broken. The life I was chasing was a pipe dream. I surrendered. It was over.

The LORD YAH has already revealed the intricate details of what I mentioned above, but the other day He reminded me of the other side to the equation. I felt empty you see, so I ran TO things (music, childhood talent) I reasoned would fulfill me, but that’s only half the story. The truth of the matter is I was actually running FROM (and off) my pain, my past, my hurt, my brokenness. Actually, I didn’t know it was there! Unknowingly, I didn’t want to face or deal with it. I didn’t want to confront it, so my running TO my fulfillment was actually me running FROM my pain!! Therefore, the LORD did not allow me to be successful in something I was good at because His will, His plan, His purpose was for me to know my pain – know it was there, know I was influenced by it my whole life. I was making choices and decisions out of pain I didn’t even know was there!

The truth of the will of the Father, the gospel of the Son, and the glorious and indwelling power of the Holy Ghost is to reveal, convict, redeem, restore, and set free – free from the effects of sin, pain, shame, your past, and anything else contrary to life and peace.

I’ve been freed for purpose. I now make choices out of pure love, not ignorant pain. My spirit man is awakened. My soul has been and is being purified and set free. My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. This is the will of the Father in Yahusha Ha’Mashiach concerning you. All made possible by the plan & command of God the Father, through the blood of the Son, by the illumination & drawing of the Holy Ghost. Amen.

Categories
Inspiration/Enlightenment

A Faith Mindset

I was talking to a former neighbor of mine this morning and he said something in which the LORD gave me immediate discernment. I was telling him about the cleaning business I started and I half-jokingly mentioned how I could use his help. Immediately, he asked how many accounts I had. I told him, and while still offering to help he politely said I needed to get more clients. I wasn’t offended, not in the least. It was as if the LORD was saying, “If you want people to help you/join your team then you need to give them a reason to. You have to make it worthwhile.” It’s not to say your cause, business, service, ministry, etc., is worthless. It’s just not worthwhile. It’s not worth them leaving other things for. The LORD was definitely showing me something, and I knew immediately what it was.

I hadn’t put the word out about the cleaning business. I told a few people, but I didn’t really promote it. Why? I didn’t want to attract or take on more clients than I could handle. It’s mainly myself doing the cleaning, with the exception of a few family members helping me out from time to time, so I didn’t want a lot of business to come without the proper resources and people to provide service. My mindset was to build the team first and once the team was established then I would seek more clients. While this is a logical or reasonable mindset or motive to have, it’s not one of confidence in the LORD’s faith (in me). It’s a safe mindset, not a faith mindset. It’s an ordinary mentality, not an extraordinary! It’s comfortable, not extreme! This is very intriguing to me, even while I write this! If there’s anyone who has received and beheld the LORD’s extreme, lavish, extraordinary Grace and care these past few years it’s me. So, how could I settle for a safe mentality?!?! I’m not sure, but one thing I do know is this: the Lord Jesus did not lavish me with His love and faith for me to play it safe. I’m going all in and all out with this Grace! I am and will be a great steward and investor of the manifold Grace of God!

The LORD brought this back to my remembrance as well. A few months ago, while contemplating starting the cleaning service, I told my wife to start buying cleaning products. I didn’t have any customers mind you, but I felt the LORD nudging me to say and do that. It wasn’t that long after she bought the products the LORD brought clients. Wow. I will never again slip into a “safe” or ordinary mindset. I was gifted extraordinary Grace to be extraordinary, daring, passionate, extreme. This is me. This is who I am in Him. In the name of the Lord Yeshua of Nazareth. Grace & Peace ✌🏾 Amen.